These are our demands….

9 Nov

(In a video-tapped hostage plea to camera, holding up newspaper)
O/S Steve: Wait wait….Kyle
O/S Kyle: No names!
O/S Steve: No….that’s a local paper; they’ll know where we are
O/S Kyle: Oh…ok
O/S Steve: Pick something else
(Holds up map)
O/S Steve: No for…god’s sake, not something that gives away our position
(Holds up novel)
O/S Steve: …no, not your book
O/S Kyle: but it’s a shortlist nominee, and available where all good books are missing….
O/S Steve: Stop spruiking your book!
(Holds up lamp)
O/S Steve: Ideally, the object proves when this was recorded
O/S Kyle: Got ya
(A puppy)
O/S Kyle: I know it’s less than ideal…
O/S Steve: Today’s date!
(Calendar)
O/S Steve: Oh, you might as well just write the date in chalk!
(The date, written in glitter)
O/S Steve: you can’t even over-literise properly!

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